Genograms and Leadership

I spent Tuesday afternoon going through files and boxes of pictures, working on my genogram. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the concept, a genogram is a diagram – something like a “family tree” – that shows your family and your place in it. It’s also an essential component for understanding the family and the congregation or organization as an emotional system. How we function in our family system is often a key to understanding how we function in our congregation and in our role as pastor, deaconess, or associate in ministry. Family Systems theory is based on the work of Murray Bowen and his most famous student, Edwin Freidman (Generation to Generation, A Failure of Nerve). Peter Steinke (Healthy Congregations, How Your Church Family Works) also draws heavily upon it. It’s less of a theory about families and congregations work than an entirely new way of thinking about families, congregations, and our role as leader. About 7 or 8 years ago, I was introduced to family systems thinking as a tool for doing Interim ministry. Since then, thanks to teacher, coach and friend, Margaret Marcuson (www.margaretmarcuson.com/) and colleague Michael Nel (www.consultationtoclergy.com/), I’ve continued to read, learn, and try to put into practice the principles of systems thinking in my life and ministry. With the encouragement of Margaret Marcuson, I began attending the Leadership in Ministry workshops (http://leadershipinministry.com/) which are held twice each year in one of three locations around the U.S. The usefulness of the workshops is heavily dependent upon participants’ willingness to go back and do their own “family work” in order to understand who they are and where they come from as a key to leadership. That’s why I’m working on my genogram. It’s not easy work but its well worth the effort. If you’re looking for a way to improve your leadership style in the congregation, I can’t think of a better place to start.